a senior lawyer at the Barnson and Barnson
left for work after morning coffee
later to be found locked in the car on the hard shoulder
would not get out for all the cases in China
the vehicle chocked-full with heavy-metal riffs
it was confirmed he was perfectly sober
you could say that he went highwire
you could argue he was taking the piss
yet the truth here is no other than this
the bubble in his spirit-level
broke today with a venomous hiss
a captain at the local river-ferry
no-one ever saw the man apart his crew
having done 38 years of an unparalleled service
decided today to go round and round and round
right in the middle of the river
summoned lip-reader through binoculars read out
round and round we go come rain come shit come ice come snow
you could say that he went highwire
you could argue he was taking the piss
yet the truth here is no other than this
the bubble in his spirit-level
broke today with a venomous hiss
a shop-assistant down at the grocer’s
(great disappointment to his parents who both
have splendid full-time carriers at Mr Revenue)
to every fruit and veg sold this morning threw
a free copy of a coverless CD
with his parents’ heavy-worded rows
the spoiled lad recorded daily for years
you could say that he went highwire
you could argue he was taking the piss
yet the truth here is no other than this
the bubble in his spirit-level
broke today with a venomous hiss
a builder about to finish his job
after a loud argument with his customer left
behind two balconies instead of one
one in the middle of the room as if a church-ambones
the other three meters away from the wall on the outside
hanging in the mid-air connected by a wobbly plank
you could say that he went highwire
you could argue he was taking the piss
yet the truth here is no other than this
the bubble in his spirit-level
broke today with a venomous hiss
we hope the involved will find it comforting
that in all cases a mechanic has already been called
soon all this can be put behind and yes we do
apologise for the inconvenience caused